dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize