Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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