She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize