Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I looked at my own cervix.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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