Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize