her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Text me some of your sweat
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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