You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
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