Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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