Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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