love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize