You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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