So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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