U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I wish I only lived at night.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
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