Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize