our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize