the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've created a new STD.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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