there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize