New invention idea: vibrating tampons
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize