Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize