It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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