I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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