I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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