I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
She needs sedatives and a leash
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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