My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left your underwear on the fireplace
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize