you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize