I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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