Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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