he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I came so hard my ears popped.
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