mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize