the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
That accounts for only three of the penises
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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