Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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