Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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