I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize