Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize