i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
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could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
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