I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
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There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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