Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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