office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Randomize