peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
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