It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
im calling her cock vulture from now on
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
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