i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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