Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
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other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
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