she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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