What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
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