I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize