I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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