I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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