Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize