he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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