I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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